Making out with Bernard the Elf. Uh, what?

So I had a bit of a steamy dream last night, with someone a bit out of the ordinary...but I'ma go with it for now because, damn...it was HAWT.

In dreamland...I totes made out with Bernard the Elf, from The Santa Clause.

DAFUQ is wrong with me??!

Ok, that's not entirely true. Dream Me made out with David Krumholtz who played Bernard the Elf in The Santa Clause.

Okay, that's better. 

I'm splitting hairs here, only because I don't want the image of me face-raping an elf being sent off to the universe. It's too late for that isn't it? Damn.

Whatever. The dream itself wasn't X-rated by any means, but when I woke up I still felt like I should be fanning myself delicately from the experience.

The funny thing is, I am completely sure this is entirely twitter's fault. I follow @DaveKrumholtz and he is possibly one of my favourite tweeters in existence. For Example:

"The guy in the hunting enthusiast t-shirt is hitting on the lady wearing toe socks, an elaborate back tattoo, glasses and a smile at O'hare."

"He hunts, she knits. He's got a Camouflage bag, she's got Louis Vuitton. He wears Oakley sunglasses, she wears the latest from Walgreen's."

"He's fascinated with her footwear. She's like, "What about my eyes??" He has A.D.D. She's BiPolar 2. I hope to christ they don't fuck."

Also, uh...I fucking love this guy! He was in 10 Things I Hate About You, and Numb3rs, and Freaks and Geeks, and he's hilarious...and I'm pretty sure we'd get along outside the twisted dream-verse of my brain, but whatever. I understand the laws of the universe don't work that way.

*sigh* I'll just have to be content with all the dream-making-out. Woe.